<![CDATA[BLUE MOUNTAIN RHYTHMS - BLOG...LET\'S TALK]]>

<![CDATA[BLUE MOUNTAIN RHYTHMS - BLOG...LET\'S TALK]]>Sat, 04 Apr 2026 02:15:35 -0700Weebly<![CDATA[Covid-19 Reminders]]>Thu, 01 Oct 2020 16:53:51 GMThttps://www.bluemountainrhythms.com/bloglets-talk/covid-19-remindersPlease take care of yourself and your family during this challenging times with Covid-19. Follow the guidelines of our health professionals as they work to keep us safe.

Below are some reminders for you to review. I will post some reminders from time to time. Source...The Internet

]]><![CDATA[Positive task #12: Remembrances for the Holiday Season]]>Tue, 03 Dec 2019 18:11:59 GMThttps://www.bluemountainrhythms.com/bloglets-talk/positive-task-12-remembrances-for-the-holiday-season

It’s that time of year when most people are thinking about the holidays season, and especially gift giving. I have learned over the years that the stress of trying to shop and please everyone is not worth it. To help you stay more peaceful and stress free, try to remember that everyone who knows you well, already know who you are and what you are about. They know you love them, so don’t think that a Christmas present is going to be the determining factor of that love. No matter what you see on television, keep your focus and remember…

During the holiday season, don’t celebrate the misfortune of others. Everyone does not have the same opportunities.
Keep in mind that not everyone celebrate Christmas. Be respectful of that.
Don’t worry about gifts. There are many who do not experience receiving or giving gifts as a holiday practice.
Don’t allow what others are doing to influence what you should do. Be yourself.
If you are blessed to have more than you need, share what you have with others.
If you are not an atheist, go to church and worship with others.
Don’t spend a lot of money on decorations. Simply brighten your home with seasonal colors.
Make your own authentic decorations/toys for your home and family. Use what you have around the house.
Tell your own Christmas stories. What a legacy you can create!
Create your own Christmas traditions and enjoy the experiences that come your way.

Resource to explore: https://www.wikihow.com/Celebrate-Christmas, https://centsai.com/life/holidays/holidays-blogs/how-to-celebrate-christmas-without-gifts/

]]><![CDATA[POSITIVE TASK #11: 10 Ways to Build Relationships with Kids.]]>Mon, 04 Nov 2019 18:47:18 GMThttps://www.bluemountainrhythms.com/bloglets-talk/positive-task-11-10-ways-to-build-relationships-with-kids

If you want to be a good parent, aunt, uncle, friend, to a child, it’s important to work on having a relationship built on honesty and trust with him/her. Having a closer connection to a child not only helps that child to be happy and healthy, but it helps the family to live a more stress free life. When you the adult, engage in building a great relationship with your child, not only do you create an environment that is more peaceful and stress free, you create a person who is disciplined and able to make good decisions as they grow.

Grooming a child takes a lot of time and effort, but the pay off in the end can far outweigh the time spent engaging with your child. To help you begin the journey of being a fully “present” adult in a child/s life, here are some ideas you can try.

Remember learning new skills takes time. Don’t rush the process. Take you time and break task in manageable pieces. If you can’t get to number ten, choose one thing to do and do it until it becomes a consistent part of your daily life.

Sources to explore…https://www.ahaparenting.com/parenting-tools/connection/building-relationship
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/how-to-build-a-positive-relationship-with-your-child_b_6174996

]]><![CDATA[POSITIVE TASK #10:Questions to Replace “How Was Your Day.”]]>Wed, 02 Oct 2019 18:52:16 GMThttps://www.bluemountainrhythms.com/bloglets-talk/positive-task-10questions-to-replace-how-was-your-day

It’s important that you engage your kids in some conversation at some point throughout the day. One of the times to do so (not always the favorite for kids) is when you see them after school. It’s a good time to “catch up” and share what each person did throughout the day. Most of us usually stick with the old tried and true, “How was your day”’. Nothing wrong with that as a starter sentence, but here is a list of questions parents can ask to replace the most common question we usually ask, “How was your day?”

Choose one of the suggested questions from the chart above. Use its a “frame” to question your child for a week. As you do so, think about the kinds of responses you are getting form your child and compare them to that of those given for the other responses you usually get. Do you observe a difference in their responses and/or thinking? If yo like what you are hearing, continue to use these sentence frames throughout the year. Create your own questions to add to the list.
Let me know how you are doing at www.bluemountaiinrhythms.com.

#CriticalThinking

Source for chart: The Internet/Twitter

]]><![CDATA[POSITIVE TASK #9: Be Involved in Your Kids School Life]]>Tue, 03 Sep 2019 16:52:31 GMThttps://www.bluemountainrhythms.com/bloglets-talk/positive-task-9-be-involved-in-your-kids-school-life

It’s Back-To-School season once again and the excitement of a new beginning is still fresh for most kids and parents. Let’s be clear, there will be a few kids who will dread the thought of going back to school and a few parents who will be traumatized by the thought of their child having new experiences they have no control over.

Based on my experience in the educational system, one thing I know for sure, is that parents need to be, and must be involved in their children’s school life. As your child goes through the door each morning for school, you as a parent cannot just be content to say goodby, have a nice day, and retire to “your world.”

It is a general consensus that if parents are involved in every aspect of their child’s school life, the child will be a more responsible student/person. Parental involvement send signals to a child that makes parent expectations clear. When a parent is not actively engaged in what a child is doing at school, the message sent to the child is one which says, I don’t care, or you are on your own

Children need parents to be involved in their school life and here are a few reasons why…

Your kids will earn better grades
Your kids will behave better
The self-confidence of your child all skyrocket
Your child becomes more successful in all areas
You as parent will become more comfortable with the school system

The number of parents involved in their child’s school life must increase. Participating must increase in the way they interact with your child about school, and in the school system itself. It cannot be left to the School District, the principal, or the teachers to take care of everything your child will need. If your child is to rise to the level you desire, you must be an engaged parent. #Let'sGo!

       INVOLVEMENT ENGAGEMENT ACADEMIC SUCCESS

Some source to explore...https://www.mannersmentor.com/the-five-manners-for-opening-every-door/,   http://neatoday.org/2014/11/18/the-enduring-importance-of-parental-involvement-2/
http://neatoday.org/2014/11/18/the-enduring-importance-of-parental-involvement-2/,   https://www.educationworld.com/a_special/parent_involvement.shtm

]]><![CDATA[POSITIVE TASK #8: Holding Doors Open]]>Sat, 17 Aug 2019 14:30:49 GMThttps://www.bluemountainrhythms.com/bloglets-talk/positive-task-8-holding-doors-open

Often as is enter a building the person ahead of me is totally oblivious to the idea of holding the door open for me. I learned this social skill as a little girl. I don’t quite remember who taught it to me, but it was a regular practice in my surroundings. Fast forward to me being an adult, and I am often left a little surprised and annoyed that other adults don’t think about this act! Personally, I think it’s an important social skill everyone needs to have in their repertoire.
When should we hold a door open? An example is …

When you have entered a building followed immediately by another person. Whether it be at a library, church, school, the mall, a theatre, or a restaurant, try holding the door open for the person following behind you.

What are the benefits for doing this?…

It’s a nice thing to do
You are being kind
You are practicing good manners
You are acknowledging the other person’s presence
You are saying to the person behind you, “you matter”
You want others to do the same for you
You are not being selfish

As you consider opening a car door, an elevator door, the door of an office building, etc., think about whether or not it is necessary based on distance, awkardness, or just the reason you may want to do it.
If you want to be considered a “nice” person, try teaching and practicing this unwritten social code. You are in control and will feel better for it.

A source to explore...https://www.mannersmentor.com/the-five-manners-for-opening-every-door/

]]><![CDATA[POSITIVE TASK #7: Be Gracefully Honest]]>Tue, 02 Jul 2019 19:55:14 GMThttps://www.bluemountainrhythms.com/bloglets-talk/positive-task-7-be-gracefully-honest

It is not as difficult to be honest as some would want you to believe. Honesty may require one main characteristic, that of being courageous. Being courageous is required at times when you have to deliver a message to someone (maybe someone you really care about), that is factual, requiring you to be straightforward, and sincere in your delivery. The thought of being deceptive, does not enter into your mind especially if you are concerned about honor, and having a high standard of regard for yourself and others. “Calling a spade a spade,” “biting the bullet” are two idioms that comes to mind.

Why should we be gracefully honest? Among other things, …

We want others to think well of us. We don’t want to feel embarrassment or shame.
We want to protect our image. We don’t want others to think that we are a failure and fail to act courageously.
We don’t want to waste our energy unnecessarily doing something we don’t want to do.
We feel good about ourselves because our conscience is clear.
Others will trust us and in so doing, we become trustworthy.
Our judgement about decision making is sound.
We are happier in our daily interactions because we are not worried about hiding something we don’t want others to know.

It’s good to note here the the person who practices being dishonest will reap the opposite benefits of being honest. Dishonest people can tell you that most often, they live a life of misery. They are always worried about their daily interactions, not sure about how their day will go from second to second. They spend more time trying to figure out ways to cover up one deception after another. Who really wants to live in this state?

Being gracefully honest, allows one to be engaged in more pleasant exchanges with others, which will eventually lead to more fulfilling relationships. Who wouldn’t want that? Go out and get your feelings of tranquility on!

#BEGRACEFULLYHONES
Source;https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/happiness-in-world/201402/why-be-honest

]]><![CDATA[POSITIVE TASK #6: Talk Less But Say More]]>Tue, 11 Jun 2019 15:59:15 GMThttps://www.bluemountainrhythms.com/bloglets-talk/positive-task-6-talk-less-but-say-more

Ok, so some us have a problem here. How do we talk less but say more. The answer may lie in us being better listeners. It’s a skill that most of us will have to practice daily, because at the base of the implementation lies the difficulty of allowing oneself to be quiet. No one wants to be quiet when they have something to say, and want to express it immediately to anyone who will listen! Our focus is often not to be quiet and be a good listener when someone is speaking. Our goal is to let the audience know that we have something to say, and it cannot wait.
Regardless of our eagerness to talk, it is just as important to listen. Listening, to talk less, and at the same time say more, requires one to choose what needs to be communicated wisely. We must be clear, and purposeful.

Here are some things to consider as we move towards being better talkers and listeners.

Why we should talk less:

It gives others a chance to express themselves
When you speak less, you can do more
You become more thoughtful
You are not the “empty filler” person
You are telling others that you value them
Not everything you have to say is important

Why we must listen more.:

It gives others time to finish their speech
It allows others to share their perspective
You get to see things from the point of view of the other person
You get to receive information
Others will listen when you speak
You are being thoughtful and mature

Remember that your goal is to talk less and listen more, so be wise about your choices.

Source…https://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/6-benefits-speaking-less-and-listening-more.html

]]><![CDATA[POSITIVE TASK #5: Remember Names... (Except When You Are Old)]]>Mon, 06 May 2019 20:32:24 GMThttps://www.bluemountainrhythms.com/bloglets-talk/positive-task-5-remember-names-except-when-you-are-old

Are names important? Is it ok not to refer to people by their given names? In my career, I have met many student who changed their given name once migrating to the US because there were some who could not pronounce or spell it. What? I admit I was challenged by some names, but rather that say, I’ll call you by ‘new” name, out of respect for the person (children or adults) I always promised to try hard to learn the pronunciation and spelling. I found the lack of respect for someone’s name quite disturbing and wondered why it wasn’t important for others to call people by their given name. It is for me extremely important.

A name is an identity marker! It is given to you by parents who had something special in mind when they chose the name. Some parents may have chosen a name because it honors someone, because it refers to something special, because it is unique, or because it carries some expectation.
Author Rachel Miller, suggests that “many parents believes that a name holds the power to shape a child's self-esteem and his identity—and influence how he's seen and treated by others.” It is a permanent decision that most parents take seriously.

Most of the children I met, and whose names had been changed disliked it. The older ones especially, thought they had lost apart of themselves. So what can we do? First, we might need to think about the implications of not using/calling people by their given names. Take a look at what is suggested by Mike Garry (2015)… “The Importance of Names and Calling People by Names.” CYS. Source…http://cultureandyouth.org/identity/articles-identity/the-importance-of-names/. Secondly, look at the questions for reflection and discussion below to help guide your thinking.

Questions for Reflection and Discussion

To what extent, do you think, a person’s name is an essential aspect in their sense of individual identity?
What does your birth name mean to you? Why? What other names do you carry around? If they are freeing, how can you use them to encourage others? If they are heavy, what will it look like to crawl out from beneath that/those weight(s)?
Is it appropriate to change our names? In what ways? For what reasons
How do we go about naming others? Do these names bring healing or harm? What does this reveal about who we are?

Implications

It is beneficial to study the naming of children across cultures perhaps starting with a Wikipedia article: “Naming Ceremony”.
It might be important to study or consider the most negative and vulgar names we can throw at a person, which undermine his/her dignity and personhood.
Like many important human traditions, naming of children can become trivialized—a matter of checking out the most popular boy and girl names on the Internet.

Think about whether or not you are willingly to undermine a person’s dignity when we refuse to make an effort to refer to them by their given name. Which path will you choose?
Source…https://www.parenting.com/article/how-important-is-a-name

]]><![CDATA[POSITIVE TASK #4:Do Not Respond To Negativity]]>Tue, 02 Apr 2019 17:04:29 GMThttps://www.bluemountainrhythms.com/bloglets-talk/positive-task-4do-not-respond-to-negativity

Why is most often, rather easy to respond to negativity? Without giving our responses much thought, we are often primed and ready to give a very sharp, negative response to something said that we don’t like hearing. It can be face to face, or on social media where we often give or receive an immediate negative response to a thought/view we may not like. Of course I am guilt of that as well and I have noticed that responding to negativity can make the situation worse. What I am learning to do now though, is to think about how I could respond in a more positive way that will still be effective. It take practice, but it can be done. I am practicing not to respond to every negative view I might hear, read, or is the recipient of. If I am to understand the issue at hand, then I must learn how to be less reactive.

So how do I try to handle this or what might you do to not respond to negativity? If you are wanting to be more effective in your communication, then as often as possible…

Let the person know you understand how they feel. Validate their thoughts. Say, “I understand how/why you feel that say.”…
Find some place to agree with the person. You may not agree with everything, but they may be Abel to redirect their response in another way.
Find out if there is anything positive in the view/comment and reinforce that.
Find out what they are positive about and reinforce that.
Ignore. You can be aware of what is said or read, but do not respond
Respond with a positively. Say something nice in return.

Acting in a rude manner is very easy to do for most of us. You don’t have to think about being polite, it’s a “free for all!” Anything can happen, and anything goes. It’s more difficult for us to exercise some control about what we say or do. If your goal is to keep your “good” reputation intact, then practice being kind and watch how you respond to negativity or negative people. Remember when communication gets confrontational and emotions are heightened, this is the time you need to take a breath and think before you speak. Let’s try…breath and carry on with your positive and happy self!

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/how-we-work/201210/how-respond-negativity
https://hbr.org/2012/09/how-to-respond-to-negativity.html

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